Dear 22 year old self.... I was reading through your journal today. You see I'm prepping to speak at this peace and justice conference thing in California next month. I was hoping to find your thoughts from what you saw first hand in the Holy Land, moving between Israel and Palestine. Turns out that is in a different journal....so as I read entries post trip when you were jet lagged, burdened, and praying through your last semester of college, I can't help but wish I could sit with you, hold your hand, and share. If I could time travel, this is what I would say...
You are too hard on yourself. Everything seems immediate, and urgent, but it's not. To figure out, to decide....just breathe. Enjoy the friendships you do have and forget all those silly people that don't know how to socialize properly. The friends that matter...you still talk to them. Everything else has come in its time and season, and yes, we're still waiting on a few things, but life these days is far from dull.
You actually knew who you were. I apologize for letting us forget for a few years....took a while and many odd jobs to get back to our roots. We DO love staying at host homes of complete strangers...in fact, that happens quite a lot these days. And that whole music, sharing with people, worship thing, well, it's what we do.
Some things will never change. You will still fall love at the drop of a hat with a good looking boy with a killer smile that you will only be around for a finite amount of time. If he doesn't live in the woods of Pennsylvania, it will be the beaches of South Carolina, or the mountains of Colorado.
And lastly, embrace the ache. It is the heart of God to feel burdened for others, for the injustice we see on earth, and to long for His kingdom. There is tension in what is and what is to come. It is wrenching and beautiful.
Also, that bucket list with #16. Go on a cruise? You got dragged on one last year. You hated it. I can't believe that ever made it on the list.
Sincerely, Your 30 year old self